My daughter was discouraged. She’s just tried laser tag for the first time at a friend’s birthday party, and her Red Team had come in last with points. I pointed out that there were only two teams, and, at 5 years old, she was the youngest kid at the party. But more importantly, I seized the opportunity to discuss the idea of imperfection. “You don’t have to be perfect at something the first time,” I told her. “In fact, you never have to be perfect at all.”

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If only we adults could believe that, we’d be far healthier. Perfection doesn’t exist, and in chasing it we not only become exhausted but also miss out on the learning opportunities that life is trying to deliver. Maybe we need to embrace wabi-sabi.

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“Wabi-sabi is the beauty of things imperfect, impermanent, and incomplete, the antithesis of our classical Western notion of beauty as something perfect, enduring, and monumental,” writes Leonard Koren, the author of Wabi-Sabi: for Artists, Designers, Poets & Philosophers. As Gretchen Roberts so gracefully reflects in her essay for Whole Living, “Wabi-sabi is asymmetrical heirloom vegetables and handmade pottery, crow’s feet and the frayed sleeves of a favorite wool sweater, exposed brick and the first draft of a difficult letter. You won’t find wabi-sabi in Botox, glass-and-steel skyscrapers, smartphones, or the drive for relentless self-improvement. It’s a beauty hidden right in front of our eyes, an aesthetic of simplicity that reveals itself only when animated through the daily work of living.”

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The daily work of living. Work. That’s a process, not a destination. Perfection is a gleaming city where we can never arrive. But daily work, that, my friend, is a path we are already on. Here are some affirmations for embracing imperfection.

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1. Being human is messy, and that’s okay.
2. “You are enough. You are so enough. It is unbelievable how enough you are.” –Sierra Boggess
3. There is only one me.
4. I am genuine. I am real.
5. “Creation is ready to serve you if you just be you.” – Yogi Bhajan
6. I am miraculous just the way I am.
7. I am worthy of love.
8. A huge part of success is making mistakes.
9. I turn toward my difficulties instead of trying to fix them instantly.
10. Mistakes can lead to great new ideas.
11. What is most “imperfect” about me may, in fact, be my best qualities.
12. When I mess up, I easily move on.
13. I can clearly see the beauty and joy in my life.
14. I release the need for approval from others.
15. My goal is wisdom, not perfection.
16. If goals are unrealistic, I find a space where imperfection is considered acceptable.
17. “Have no fear of perfection. You’ll never reach it.” – Salvador Dali

By:   Kathryn Drury Wagner

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